To my love, Medina
I miss your fat cheeks and jovial smiles. Your round face makes me drool when I think about you. Also, nothing has changed ever since I went to South Africa a year ago. I know I haven’t been writing to you like I used to do those days.
But I still want to assure you one thing; our love is still intact, I haven’t found another one, except this sugar mummy that is always bagging me to hook her up with a sexually fertile gentleman in Nairobi.
You see, I accidentally locked my car keys when I went visiting my parents at Buruburu last week. This was the root cause of all my troubles because I had to leave that car at my parents place.
Also, since I was so drunk that day and didn’t want to spend the night at my parent’s, I decided to Uber my way home. That’s simple, right?
It was supposed to be my birthday, and God was so great. I received a lot of messages on Facebook, Twitter and even in one of my blogs wishing me many more years lived happily.
In fact, my mother called to sing the whole happy birthday song before sending me Ksh220 to have ugali and beans. She’s the best I have ever had.
That morning, I woke up, took shower and dressed up ready to leave the house. I hit an Uber signal at around 8.50am. A young man called Mike responded. But then he ended up canceling on me because he had faced some challenge along the way. I suspected his car had been attacked or something.
I decided to hit a second Uber signal around 8.56am. A guy called David responded. He ended up canceling on me too.
I was disappointed. I wanted to see this lady called Shanice who lives in Muthaiga. She said she worked with one of the biggest insurance companies in town. I had a business appointment with her.
By the way, this reminds me of the fact that I had not told you about this lady before.
This lady says she works with one of the most popular insurance companies in Nairobi. She owns an apartment in Muthaiga — on your way to Kiambu town, plus she is financially balanced.
But she had one problem. She had been single for a long time. The kind of men she encountered were all jokers and didn’t have enough sexual prowess to satisfy her. For this reason, she has remained single and is now willing to give it a try with a guy who is sexually fertile.
She wanted to request me to get her a smart sugar boy in Nairobi. She had heard that I was good at hooking people up in Nairobi and its environs.
As at now, she just needs a soulmate and a potentially future partner if things go according to plan.
She says she is very serious about getting a soulmate, so she doesn’t care about age, tribe, region, location etc etc. All she cares about is getting a serious and sexually fertile man she can settle down with if things work.
In other words, she was asking me to sugar mummy her, which I refused. But I promised her that I was soon going to get her some guy who would be a perfect fit for her.
Remember, I had to walk to the stage and take a boda boda before boarding a mathree to my destination (where I would meet this sugar mummy because my car wasn’t available). It was the worst birthday I ever encountered in my life.
If you know of guys who have been looking for sugar mummies in Kenya or within Nairobi and have not been successful, you can ask them to contact me directly and I will give Shanice’ number to whoever comes first.
Also, team mafisi, if you’re interested in this sugar mummy, text your name, location and the word Shanice to 0705538867. If you’re a joker, I will dismiss you as always. It’s good to take note of that.