Facebook Money Lover

I used to write 4, 5, 6 or 7 paragraphs of words to you when we first began. But these days, I don’t have much time like I used to. I swear that I still have many more stories from the deepest arteries and veins in my heart.

You see, days ago, I told you about how a merciless matatu conductor dropped me near a graveyard at night because I didn’t have change for 1000 bob.

In another incident,  I found myself in the same compound with Mike Sonko, Shebesh and a few policemen. There were gunshots everywhere, and 1000s of beautiful women were screaming at the top of their voices.

And then there was another one of that beautiful Kikuyu lady, teaching Sunday school and pronouncing those words as Sade Skoo.

I also remember that one of pastor Kanyari, when he forced a Kikuyu lady to scream at the top of her voice, pronouncing ”Touch me Lord” as Tash me Rod! But this will not be my story for today. Instead, I want to focus on something else – how a money lover on Facebook tried robbing me in broad daylight.

Be advised!

sex in kenyaThis is a Facebook conversation I engaged in at the beginning of the year. As it is, I didn’t even meet the woman at the end of it all, because I wanted to secure my love for you. I also didn’t want to fall in a thief’s trap, lest she milks me dry.

The conversation………

Me: Hello cute?

Girl: (seen 4 minutes ago)

Me: Hey,

Girl: (seen 2 minutes ago)

Me: Hey, say something, am giving up on you

Girl: (seen 3 minutes ago)

Me: Okay, good night cute, I only wanted to tell you how I have received my salary of half a million, and I have 100,000K for your shopping and rent

Girl: Wow!! Sure, when can we meet?

Me: (Seen 4 minutes ago)

Girl: Please dear, would you answer me. You see, I was off last time, so when do we meet?

Me: (Seen 3 minutes ago)

Girl: Am sure you’re there, and you’re reading this, please answer hun

Me: (seen 4 minutes ago)

Girl: Okay, good night, and tomorrow I must come to your place for a visit, okay!!!!

Please note that I ignored her completely. She thought she was the early bird, so she wanted to catch the worm first. I was far ahead. Akiamka, mi nimeanza ku-deworm